I've come to realize that teacher problems are probably the most random, funniest problems there are. We have real problems, of course, but a lot of the time I find myself standing somewhere and coming up with a solution to the most ridiculous problems I've every heard.
Just yesterday I heard a story about a teacher who had a student, that I have now, who used to smell her hair. Like multiple times per day. Whaaaaaat!?!
The 8th graders went on a field trip to Crystal Park in Montana last week. Crystal Park is basically a dirt hillside chock full of actual crystals. I don't know why they're they, but it's darn cool! After a 2.5 hour drive filled will camp songs, giggles, occasional scolding, and all the smells that come with a bus load of middle schoolers, we arrived at the park. The kids were armed with shovels, pails, and sifting screens and off they went. Dirt flew and kids exclaimed as they found crystals worth keeping.
At one point, one boy saw a squirrel and yelled, "SQUIRREL!!!" Four boys ran after him while one hollered, "Don't touch the wildlife." I'm still not sure what the goal of chasing a squirrel was, but they were on a mission. They walked back to their spot after a spirited 4-second chase. Around that same time (here's where teacher problems come in), some other students came tearing down the hill shouting that another boy had killed a chipmunk with a rock. It was big news! The student in question came down shortly after, and I asked him what had happened. He replied that he didn't know. "Well did you do it on purpose?" I asked. He was adamant that he did not do it on purpose, and after thinking for a second, I realized that the likely hood of hitting a chipmunk with a rock on purpose probably wasn't that great. Then he told me that another teacher had it. When I asked why, he said that the teacher was going to take it to his wife (another teacher at the school). I tried to wrap my mind around why this teacher would want to take a dead chipmunk to his wife while the student shrugged his shoulders and wandered off.
When I saw the teacher in question coming down to path towards me I asked if he had given the chipmunk mouth-to-mouth. "Not yet," he said and tapped his shirt pocket. The chipmunk, with a broken leg and a head injury, was tucked snugly in his pocket. He transported it back to school in an empty water bottle and as of today, it's still alive!
Last year, I had a group of girls bring me a baby bird who chirped through my last three classes of the day. I had kids feed it with an eye dropper during down time.
And that's just a taste of a day in the life of a teacher :)